Sunday, July 30, 2006

The Pam/Kid Wedding Album

Saturday, on a yacht off the coast off St. Tropez ...

KID SHLOCK and SPAM ANDERSON had a hillbilly wedding!

But then the Corona and Gin and Juice ran out! And so did their buzzes ...

Will true love prevail?

Related News:
Pam: What a Hooker!
Kid Rock on Pam and the Sex Tape!

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Saturday, July 29, 2006

Mel Gibson on Drunk-Driving Rampage?

MEL GIBSON was arrested by Malibu sheriffs for driving drunk Friday night and now has obtained an amazingly profane police report detailing Mad Max's drunken rant against the sheriffs, "effing Jews" and lady cops. He drops the F-bomb a hundred times, and at one point, sheriffs say the "Passion of the Christ" director tells a lady police officer, "What the f*** do you think you're looking at Sugar Tits?" Here's exclusive video of Mel during his booze-filled drive ....

Okay, that's actually "South Park"'s spoof of Mel behind the wheel, but you get the idea. This guy is off his rocker.

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Thursday, July 27, 2006

Pam Is Such A Hooker, Even On Her Wedding Day

PAM ANDERSON is in Las Vegas today, kicking off her new poker site, and her Wedding-palooza tour in which she is, hold on, what the heck ???...

Oh geez, pull yourself together, sister! Ah, I see, she dropped her promotional poster for ...

So, as I was saying, here's Pam with her hubby to be ... HOLY JESUS!

Okay, seriously folks, she's marrying KID ROCK in about four cities, she says. "I'm going to get married a few times this month to the same guy," she tells the media. The star couple will reportedly kick off their month-long celebration this Saturday in St. Tropez, France, before moving on to Malibu, Detroit, Nashville. Nashville? Here's hoping the bride wears SHOES.

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Wednesday, July 26, 2006

Just an Excuse to Post a Picture of Nekkid People

It's not really news but today a hinky Scottish photographer convinced 33 people to doff their knickers and pose for Scotland's first piece of live naked art. The nudists included a fireman, some American tourists and a lady who got her first spray-on Mystic Tan just for the occasion (lower left).

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'Drama Queen' Lindsay Rushed to Hospital Again

If it's Wednesday that means LINDSAY LOHAN is back in the ER again. This time the party girl is being treated for "overheating and exhaustion," media reports say. She was rushed from the set of her new movie 'Georgia Rule' (starring fossil JANE FONDA and FELICITY HUFFMAN) to an L.A. hospital where she recieved a vitamin B shot. At least, we THINK it's vitamin B. It was probably Kool-Aid and vodka for all we know ...

Related News:
Laughing at the Lindsay, Paris Catfight

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Monday, July 24, 2006

Who Weighs More: Nicole or Pocket Pooch?

NICOLE RICHIE is appearing in her dad LIONEL's new music video, "I Call it Love," being walked by some skinny bizzatch in a giant head scarf. Oh wait, scratch that, reverse it! Her billionaire pops Lionel is speaking out about his adopted daughter's weight, telling "Access Hollywood": "What are fathers for if you can't point the finger every once in awhile? I think the good part of it is she is aware of it. ... She has heard this all of her life from me, so this just a continuation of the reminder." She has to be reminded to eat? Wow, what a life!

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How the Stars Spent Their Weekends

Dumb and Dumber: Part Duh? JIM CARREY squeeze JENNY McCARTHY and sis AMY celebrated her birthday with pink wigs at Jet nightclub in Vegas.

X-TINA grinded another girl onstage in London ...

While naughty GEORGE MICHAEL got caught cruising for sex in a UK park -- AGAIN!

The honorable News of the World tabloid caught the singer red-handed and red-faced as he emerged from the bushes after cavorting with a "pot-bellied, 58-year-old, jobless van driver." The paper writes, that, "When challenged George, 43, was wild-eyed and trembling. Trying to hide his face under a baseball cap, he screamed: 'I don't believe it! F*** off! If you put those pictures in the paper, I'll sue!'" Ah, suit on?

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Friday, July 21, 2006

Friday Funnies: Chad Vader -- Daytime Grocery Manager!

Life isn't easy when you're DARTH VADER's little brother. And those meddling minions of the rebellion keep thwarting your devilish plans for supremacy at the local Quickie Mart. Watch and see!

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Paris: 'I'm not a Slut, But My Friends Are'

In a rare brush with reality, PARIS HILTON responded to bloggers' claims that she is "just an oversized human condom" and "a fart in a mitten. You know it's there, you can't stand it, but you can't get rid of it" on this week. However, in true heir-head fashion, the sex-tape queen countered by blaming the diseased hosebags she surrounds herself with. "I'm not a slut," she told TMZ editor HARVEY LEVIN. "I'm far less promiscuous than any of my friends." Ahh, yes. That may in fact be true, for someone who hangs out with PAM ANDERSON and PAULY SHORE (see below), but, if that's the case, couldn't she just buy new friends? Harvey ambushed Paris with her publicist ELLIOTT MINTZ, and amazingly read these insults to her face. I'm not saying this is great gonzo journalism, because the whole thing looks and feels like a complete set-up between Harvey and her publicist from start to finish, right down to the part where she says she "cries" sometimes because of all the hurtful haters. Still, it has a certain TARA REID's-boob-out-on-the-red-carpet quality. You want to look away, but you just can't! (Sorta like this Pauly/Paris photo -- shudder). See the video interview here.

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Thursday, July 20, 2006

Haley Joel Sees Dead People, But Misses Pillar

"Sixth Sense" star HALEY JOEL OSMENT wrapped his car around a pillar last night around 1 a.m. in Los Angeles. Cops say the kid who saw "dead people" was heading home in his 1995 Saturn when he careened into the brick obstruction. I think you'll join me here when I say: 1995 Saturn??? Hey, where's all that SHYAMALAN dough? Oh no, do we have another COREY HAIM on our hands?! Haley Joel was taken to the hospital where I certainly hope he gets better, so that he can purchase a hotter set of wheels. I hear Pontiac makes a bitchin' Grand Prix. His next film is "Home of the Giants," in which the 18-year-old plays a high school journalist covering a basketball team as it heads toward the state championship.

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Eat Your Hearts Out Jessica, Paris, Lindsay!

MICHELLE PFEIFFER is 48 and still smoking' hot!

Plus, girlfriend's got class ...

Errrr, well, at least she's got a bunch of movies in the pipeline, including "I Could Never Be Your Woman," by "Clueless" director AMY HECKERLING (love it!), and a fantasy flick with CLAIRE DANES and BOBBY DeNIRO called "Stardust." De Niro? Okaaay. Check her out in the new InStyle magazine on stands tomorrow!

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Wednesday, July 19, 2006

TRL Scurries to Avoid Jessica/Vanessa Catfight!

How convenient is it that just as JESSICA SIMPSON is scheduled to appear on MTV's "TRL" today to premiere her new music video, co-host VANESSA MINNILLO, who is dating Jessica's ex, is curiously absent? Yep, today at 3:30, li'l Miss Hair Extensions is debuting her new video "A Public Affair" (hey, no snickering!) on MTV. But "TRL" cutie Vanessa, who has been all over the tabloids holding hands with NICK LACHEY recently, is oddly nowhere to be found. Hmmmm.For those of us curious about Jess's new video, it has a sort of "Girls Behaving Badly" theme and features Jess roller-skating with her Hollywood gal pals EVA LONGORIA, CHRISTINA MILIAN, MARIA MENOUNOS and CHRISTINA APPLEGATE. Get a sneak peek below ...

Related News:
Nick Denies Dating Vanessa
Jessica, Kristin's Got Yer Man!
Nick Needs a Hug

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Tuesday, July 18, 2006

No Wonder Vin Diesel Disappeared

VIN DIESEL turns 38 today, which made me wonder: Where the hell is Vin Diesel? Sadly, we haven't heard from the Popeye-armed action figure since that dud, "The Pacifier." Perhaps an answer can be found in this video clip, in which DAVID SPADE strung together clips of Vin repeating the same lame stories over and over to different talk show hosts.

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Pam and Kid: Just 2 Hillbillies in Love!

KID ROCK's still got the jimmies for PAM ANDERSON, who today announced in typical rambling style on her Website that she is getting MARRIED.
"Yes. I'm finally getting's been a whirlwind...spontaneous but well thought through. Feels like I've been stuck in a time warp. Not able to let go of MY family's been sad and lonely and frustrating....I've raised my kids alone in hope of a miracle. Well my miracle came and went. And came back and came back because he knew that I'd wake up one day and realize that I was waiting for nothing. I'm moving on...I feel like I'm finally free....I'm in love. I'm happy....I see the light...sounds dramatic but it's true.....I know some women can relate to this....My children are getting older. They know the truth and they are strong, smart kids. They love their Dad. They love their new Step Dad who they've known for years...time will pass. Wounds will heal. Some people may never grow up. Actions speak louder than!"

Despite what Kid Cock said earlier this year -- "I don't want to date any more actresses and that crap, I'm over it" -- he and Pam were frolicking in France just last month. Reading between the lines, I bet that fractured "family picture" she mentions included ex TOMMY LEE, who is probably drowning his sorrows in a bottle of JD right about now.

Related News:
Kid Rock on the Sex Tape with Scott Stapp

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Monday, July 17, 2006

Little Lourdes Looks Like Madge -- With a Tan

Get a load of the Mini-Madge, MADONNA's daughter LOURDES, stepping out with the Material Mom ...

Love how Lourdes, Madonna's famous offspring from a fling with trainer CARLOS LEON, shares her mum's big, almond-shaped eyes and heart-shaped face. She's 10 now and shaping up to be a real heartbreaker. I can only imagine what will happen when she hits her teens and starts experimenting with boys and ciggies. Look out, Madge!

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Sunday, July 16, 2006

Uh Oh, Pussycat! Hold On to Your Kitty

A brisk wind nearly upstaged the PUSSYCAT DOLLS when it blew up ASHLEY ROBERTS' skirt at the opening of the annual Harrod's of London summer sale. Yes, I was shocked to learn the Pussycat Dolls have names too. And just when I had almost forgotten the IDs of those darn SPICE GIRLS too. Say, isn't that Old Spice in the middle below?

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Friday, July 07, 2006

Friday Funnies: Sexiest Man Alive?

Yep, that's People magazine's "Sexiest Man Alive," MATTHEW McCONAUGHEY, enjoying a little down time, and a lot of Bud apparently, on the beaches of Cali. This one's for you, Matt!

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Thursday, July 06, 2006

Kathy Griffin's Life Is Worse Than Yours

She may be the most-hated woman in Hollywood, but even redheaded comedian KATHY GRIFFIN doesn't deserve this! After months of rumors about a divorce and then reconciliation, she has finally come forward with an explanation as to why she and her seemingly devoted hubby, MATT MOLINE, are splitting. "My ex-husband, without my knowledge, was sneaking into my wallet when I was asleep in the mornings and taking my ATM cards from my private accounts and withdrawing money ... That money totaled $72,000." Hellz 'a' poppin'! I've heard of some crazy breakups but this is a new one on me! Mild-mannered Matt always seemed so devoted on her show, "My Life on the D-List." The man even rhapsodized about how he liked to curl her hair before her shows because he could zone out and think about his fantasy football stats. Turns out he was just figuring out how to siphon more money out of his wife's account! He's even grabbing for her purse in this picture ... LOL. Kick that deadbeat to the curb, Kathy!

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Tuesday, July 04, 2006

Angie and Gwen: Best Friends Forever?

Lately Hollywood has become like one big "Mommy & Me" club what with all the famous newborns popping out, but it's kind of funny when two, giant, star, bobbleheads collide -- like ANGELINA JOLIE and GWEN STEFANI. The super-moms and their impossibly named offspring, KINGSTON ROSSDALE and SHILOH NOUVEL JOLIE-PITT, got together for a baby playdate Sunday at Brangie's seaside Santa Barbara, Cali, retreat. Who knew these two had anything in common besides celebrity sperm? Spies say they lounged by the patio like old pals and even sported "matching baby slings." What's next? Gymboree with SEAN PRESTON and the Bride of Federline? Whatever you do, Angie, don't let BRITNEY drive!

Related News:
Britney's 'Horrifying' Harpers' Cover
My Brush with Britney
Is Britney Really the 'Simpsons' Hillbilly?
Damage Control for Britney!
Oops! Britney's Baby Goes Boom
Britney Hires Midgets for K-Fed

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Kill the Stylist: 4th of July Edition!

Happily for us, summer brings out the best and worst in celebrity fashions! Strap yourself in and enjoy these "What Were They Thinking" styles.

KEIRA KNIGHTLEY unveiled the "Pirates" sequel, "Sunken Chest," er, I mean, "Dead Man's Chest" in London.

MISCHA BARTON shows off the new Barbie "red-carpet" gown collection. (Dress is actual doll size.)

KELLY, oh no! Here's the American Idol in Miami over the weekend looking like a honey ham squeezed into a black mesh bag. "Since U Been Gone, I've been stuffing myself with HoHos and Chili Cheese Fries"???

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Sunday, July 02, 2006

What if 'Superman' Wore 'Prada'?

So how did hunky BRANDON ROUTH fare at the box office against his fellow men in tights? "Superman Returns" scored a respectable $52 million from Friday to Sunday for a total opening haul of $82 million since it opened on Wednesday. That's better than "Batman Begins," which cleaned up $48.7 million over its opening weekend and $72.9 million in its first five days, but not as good as TOBEY's "Spider-Man 2," the record-holder for best five-day openings, which nabbed $152.4 million over the Fourth of July weekend in 2004. In second place this weekend was the fashion comedy, "The Devil Wears Prada," with $27 million, which experts say was "better than expected." I can vouch for the popularity of "Prada." I tried to see it Saturday night in Century City, CA, and all the 7:10, 7:30 and 8 p.m. screenings were sold out -- so we had to see "The Break Up" instead. So the guys went to see Superman and the chicks lined up for "Prada." Uh oh, brainstorm! What if "Superman Wore Prada"? Note to BRYAN SINGER: Imagine the gross!

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